MiSeRy

you are the only person to whom i could open up.. i dont expect other people to understand what i'm going through right now.. there is no other time that i really felt as miserable as i am right now.. and day by day, i'm finding it so so hard to smile, and to be happy, and to be as energetic as i was.. it's gotten so hard to continue living this life, surrounded by selfish people, incapable of loving. i very much regretted ever living, i regretted very much having to live this life.. in the first place, i never really asked to be born.. but why is it that every minute, i am always reminded that i have to pay back for all the things that that damn mother gave me? is it not her duty? i am trying so hard to find a job, i never failed to find a job, but even if i got accepted to that job, i couldn't really go through it since i can't comply with the requirements, coz she won't give me money.. if only she had ever listened to me, all of these things wouldn't have happened.. but as usual, she is a very damn hypocrite, a very stubborn person.. i can't do anything anymore, coz the extent of the damage she has done, i can't undo them anymore.. she placed us in this predicament, i can't always go and solve things for her.. hello? she's the mom!!!but why do i end up cleaning after her mess? i'm so tired of cleaning up her mess.. let me just get this out of my chest, maybe i'm just saying this coz i'm so hurt as of the moment, but for the past few days, there is no other time that i have ever regretted that she is my mom!!!!!! and get this, call me mean or whatever, but day by day, my hatred for her has grown.. i thank her for raising such a stupid and crazy daughter: me!!!!!!